I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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