So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Randomize
