I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize