i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
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