i think my tv is drunk
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize