Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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