I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
