we're chasing vodka with high fives
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
21 Times Karma Showed These People Not to Mess Around
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner