Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
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I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
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