also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
