bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
