If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
