at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
