Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
