remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Can i not drive my cunt home
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
