Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
