Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
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