how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
either way he was missing a nipple.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
So many bounce houses so little time
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Randomize
