I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
