I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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