i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
