better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
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Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
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Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
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