I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize