For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize