guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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