Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
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