If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
These tits shall not be calmed
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
