Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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