i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
