Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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