is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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