roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
