She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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