From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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