3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Randomize
