Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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