And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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