he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize