I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
