omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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