yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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