I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize