I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
