so that wasnt chicken after all
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
