And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
