i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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