I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize