Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
