She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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