So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
