i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
There's always time for handjobs
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
i believe in u and ur pee
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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