So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
